What's going for it? What's this? Another -cester? Those Romans got about, didn't they? Nobody's much heard of Alcester. Not even the Romans. You won't find it mentioned in Tacitus or Horrible Histories. I like to think of it as the Nuneaton of the Roman empire, a lowly, lonely outpost of the civilised world. These days it still seems bypassed by everything: railways, roads – even the road to Redditch declines to stop. Think of it instead as Stratford-upon-Avon, but nicer, and without the coach parties. It wears its Shakespeare lightly. Squint and you can just imagine Bottom cavorting in the woods, leftovers of the Arden forest. Alcester itself has all the Ye Olde Midlands-y prettiness you might want – crooked, half-timbered crocks, stout, ruddy-faced Georgian brick town houses, and a high street of butchers and sweet shops, and community spirit should you want it (they held the UK's biggest royal wedding street party here).
The case against Flooding: there are new flood defences, but the low-lying town has two rivers.
Well connected? You'll need a car. The nearest train stations are at Stratford, five miles away, with hourly trains to Birmingham; Evesham, 10 miles away on the main London-Worcester route; and Redditch, 10 miles away, with half-hourly trains to Birmingham (36 minutes). Driving: 20-30 minutes to the M42/M40 and M5. Local buses hit Stratford, Redditch and Evesham.
Schools Primaries: St Nicholas' CofE is "outstanding", Ofsted says, with Our Lady's Catholic "satisfactory" and "improving rapidly"; Great Alne, just outside, is "good". Secondaries: Alcester Grammar and St Benedict's Catholic High are "outstanding".
Hang out at… Plenty of pubs in town, but for something special try the Bluebell at Henley-in-Arden.
Where to buy The old town, cupped by the river Arrow one way and the bypass the other, is delightful, especially around Church Street; lots of nice period property on the old roads out of town, such as Priory Road, Evesham Street and Henley Street. The suburbs stretch north-eastwards over the river. Root around pretty neighbouring towns and villages, such as Henley, Bidford-on-Avon and Wootton Wawen.
Market values Large detacheds, £350,000-£900,000. Town houses, £350,000-£650,000. Detacheds, £180,000-£350,000. Terraces, £120,000-£250,000. Rentals: two-bed flat or house, £600-£700pcm.
Bargain of the week Four-bedroom suburban detached, £287,500, with jeremyandco.co.uk.
From the streets
Muriel Williams "Great community spirit, civilised and friendly folk, and a wide range of activities and societies to join. The one drawback is no one wants to move, so property is hard to come by."
Emma Jones "The Turks Head is one of the best pubs in the country: wood fires, good beer, good food."
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